Aurora, Oil Pastel
Scripture: Ephesians 4:17—5:21
"Living as Children of Light"
Today, on my birthday, God reminds me and continues to instruct me on how I should live as His daughter.
God tells me to leave behind the days when I indulged in relationships within the past decade. Through such futile pursuits, I lost touch with my own sensitivity, causing my heart to become hardened and ignorant of some biblical messages I was taught since my youth. Nowadays, God is transforming me into a new self, filling me with heavenly desires and attitudes. The old self is being replaced by someone made complete with His righteousness and holiness, mirroring Him in every way. He pours His good will into my mind through His word, providing insights through His angels and the Holy Spirit. This is how I come to know Jesus, my counselor, who renews my mind and instills in me a desire to be like Him. Even though I may momentarily forget due to amnesia, short-term memory loss, and a lack of focus, He remains faithful and just, never leaving my side, so that I may internalize and understand with my heart.
"In your anger, do not sin." For months, God has been urging me not to give in to anger, despite the presence of spiritual entities playing tricks on my mind in the form of thoughts and voices. They constantly tempt me to react and respond, leading me to engage in unwholesome conversations that may be unkind if heard by the subject in question, who is not myself. Every day, I battle the temptation to imitate them and speak in my defense. However, I recognize that the devil is trying to trap me in bitterness, anger, and quarreling, which brings no benefit to anyone, including myself. I am the primary audience for the color of my thoughts. These voices tempt me to hate the individuals they have split me into, attempting to replace my sense of self. I acknowledge that this is not how I should nourish my mind and soul. I must resist the entrapments of the evil one, reminding myself that I am created whole and complete in the image of God.
I praise and give thanks to God. Despite the negative environment that evil tries to weave into my mind, God overcomes and is overcoming them with the love of Christ, enveloping me in a way that even the spiritual voices acknowledge as true. Despite the burdens in my mind, I am able to engage in acts of love through poetry, art, reading scripture and devotionals, and singing spiritual songs. I recognize these as the miracles of God working within me. He continually fills my heart with joy, allowing me to say "Thank you, Jesus" at any time of the day. With His light, I know that I can overcome darkness. "Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you."
Although I now live a life of simplicity, and my concerns in the world have been reduced to that of a Van Gogh painting, God is teaching me to live with wisdom, holiness, and kindness, even in the depths of my thought process and in my response to the devil's mind games. He continues to teach me to make the most of my opportunities, recognizing that these days, both within and outside of my reality, are filled with evil (He already knows what lies ahead of my time). I do not understand why my life has unfolded as it has, but I persistently ask God for understanding and seek to fully accept and know His good will for me. For now, I hold on to and submit to the good that remains relevant in my mind.
Comments